Einstein: “God does not play dice". In my view it would be nice if he did something else (other than play dice) once in a while. (Saltz trying to plan a sabbatical)
Confucius say "one student talking to professor, not necessarily listening". (after advising several grad students).
Journalism is much like the GI tract. It makes no difference what the quality of the material going in is, what comes out is always shit. (Saltz after giving an interview to the Ben Gurion University magazine… and reading the final output).
If there is anything less reliable than a used car salesmen, it is a statistician for a pharmaceutical company. (Saltz to his doctor who decided he needs to take medication for lowering his cholesterol).
Peter's rule – A person advances to the point he becomes ineffective.
Hyper Peter's rule – A Person must be ineffective to begin with in order to advance. (Saltz, after several years of work at the Nature and Parks Authority).
By self-definition, Murphy's laws never works.
Genesis tells us God rested on the seventh day. But there is nothing that tells us that he went back to work. The data lends strong support to this hypothesis, and if you ask me, god is permanently retired. (Saltz's response to those who believe in the existence of a god and those who don't).
Natural selection in humans has selected for individuals who want kids and worry themselves to death once they have them. (Saltz after becoming a father).
I can't remember when I lost my memory (I think it was when my first child was born).
Beware of dead horses, they can get up and run you over.
Where there are two ecologists, there are four models and sixteen interpretations.
Interesting phenomenon: There is always plenty of time in the future, but as the future draws closer it dissipates. Consequently at present I never have any time. (Saltz after contemplating the possibility of contributing a paper to a special issue of the IJEE).
Why should I go to a friend's funeral? After all he is not going to come to mine.
I don't want to go to heaven – I don't know anyone over there.
It's better to die playing than play living.
Being a conservation biologists today is like being a doctor in a hospice.
We conserve nature to secure ecosystem services. This does not mean that if we generate some ecosystem service nature is being conserved.
Odd hours are the best time to consume chocolate cake.
Being a university professor is spending your life trying to not look stupid. Most of us utterly fail at this task.
Luckily, these days, balloons are filled with helium and not hydrogen, otherwise university campuses would be subject to repeated explosions of faculty members.
We only start to worry about the future when we do not have one. (My response to the question as to whether I think my kids worry about the future).
Religion is the easiest justification of arrogance